A Cup of Tea and My TBR List

April showers…

Bring May showers? Now that we are in to May, I was hoping for some nicer weather, but here in the northeast it is still pretty gray and gloomy. On the bright side, that makes for plenty of time for reading.

As I’ve mentioned before, I read a lot. My goal for the year is 155 books, and I’m currently at 48. I was kind of impressed with myself for that, until I looked at my Goodreads reading challenge and learned I’m 3 books behind schedule. Still, I read 10 1/2 books in April…here’s a recap of some of the highs and lows.

Highest rated: “Falling Leaves: The True Story of an Unwanted Chinese Daughter” by Adeline Yen Mah. I knew that girls were treated badly in China, but wow. I was appalled at some of the things her father and stepmother did. Even her siblings, who should have been allies, were awful. But, it was one of the best written books I’ve read recently.

Lowest rated: “One Day” by David Nicholls. This was a book club choice – our last topic was an epic love story, and three people suggested this one. Sadly, none of us liked it. Only a couple of us actually finished it. I had seen the movie, and I can truly say that this is one of the few times when the movie is better than the book. I thought both Dexter and Emma were terrible people and I had no interest in what happened to them.

World War II: I have a tendency to read a lot of books set in WWII. I don’t know if it’s because there are a lot of them out there, or if I am just drawn to them. Maybe I was there in a past life. I don’t know. Anyway, I read three books with a WWII connection in April. “Last Train to Istanbul” by Ayse Kulin was the best Kindle book I read this month – a story about Turkish officials trying to get their citizens out of France after the German occupation. Kate Morton’s “The Secret Keeper” bounces between modern day Laurel and her mother Dorothy during the war years, as Laurel digs into the secrets of her mother’s past to understand the horrific crime Laurel witnessed as a teenager. And “The Carlswick Affair” by S.L. Beaumont featured a modern day feud between two families, surrounding the sale of artwork stolen by the Germans during the war. Not my favorite, but it was a Kindle freebie, and I try not to judge those too harshly, as they are often put out by struggling self-published authors.

Series: I’m a sucker for a series, especially one set in a small town, and Robyn Carr’s Sullivan’s Crossing series fits the bill. I finished “The Family Gathering”, her third book set in Colorado, and have added “The Best of Us” (#4) to my TBR shelf for May. Side note, I’m very much looking forward to seeing her Virgin River series produced on Netflix. One of these days, I’m going to write one of my own…stay tuned for more on that another day.

Great Nana-ism: Elin Hilderbrand is another favorite – her Nantucket books generally appeal to me as a New Englander. I was pleasantly surprised, however, as I read “The Identicals” to come across one of my favorite Great Nana lines: “Who is she? The cat’s mother?” It was used a few times throughout the book and made me smile every time.

To be continued: As April ended, I was mid-way through our next book club read “The Last Good Heist: The Inside Story of the Biggest Single Payday in the Criminal History of the Northeast” by Tim White, Randall Richard, and Wayne Worcester. It’s the story of the Bonded Vault heist in Providence in 1975. This was the first I’d heard about the robbery, as I was quite young in ’75 and mostly preoccupied with how to take my crib back from my baby sister. It has so far been an interesting look at how things worked in Providence in the days of Raymond Patriarca and Buddy Cianci. More on this next month when I recap my May books.

In the meantime, I’m always looking for book suggestions. Read anything good lately?

Write more, stress less

That was my New Year’s Resolution this year – write more and stress less. I’ve been doing great on the “write more” part of that goal. The “stress less” part, on the other hand, has been a little more difficult.

But, for the last few months, I’ve been subscribing to Therabox, a monthly collection of stress reducing products. I’ve tried a few here and there, but for the most part I’ve been collecting them and not using them.

Tonight, with my husband out of town, and a seriously stressful week ahead of me next week, I decided to have a home relaxation night. I had a dinner of Panera mac & cheese (and can I just say that Panera offering delivery is a wonderful thing) and a glass of Cupcake Red Velvet wine.

I’m in my most comfy yoga pants and new PHACE t-shirt, and settled in on the couch with Legally Blonde on Netflix. And I’ve got three months worth of beauty products to test out.

First up – post shower, I’ve got Unicorn Whipped Body Butter. The swirl of pastel colors is pretty and my arms and legs are now silky smooth. And I smell like a candy store.

Next, the Farmer’s Touch foot cream and a big fluffy pair of socks. I made a deal with myself that I will get a mani-pedi when I hit my first goal weight, which is still several pounds away, so in the meantime, this will soften up my heels.

My two favorite products, so far, come next. First the Z Skin Extreme Moisturizer – this arrived in my first Therabox and I’ve since ordered 3 or 4 more tubes of it. My hands are usually red and dry all winter. This magic lotion is the only product I’ve found that clears them up. Here are some before and after photos:

Before
After

The jade roller is fantastic for headache relief – I keep it in the fridge so it’s always nice and cold. Rolling it across my forehead makes even the worst headache a little bit better.

With several face masks to choose from, I opted for the Bubble Bubble Pop! Mask, as it seemed the best fit for a viewing of Legally Blonde. Upon opening, I discovered a foamy mask to be applied to the face. I was going to post a picture, but honestly, it made me look like Hannibal Lecter. I didn’t really enjoy the bubbling sensation – it made the mask feel like it was slipping off. I wore it for just under the 10 minutes recommended on the package, and then washed off the bubbles. That was followed up with a spritz of Modern Skyn Alchemy Shimmering Rose Moisturizing Mist which smells lovely.

Last but not least, I’ve done my nails – fingers and toes, in the Taupe Coat nail polish that came with the March box. It’s not my normal color, but I like it enough to hold me over until I lose those last few pounds and hit the nail salon.

For the record, I’m getting nothing in return for this post – it’s a purely unsolicited observation of my experience with the various products I’ve received through the Therabox subscription.

So here I am, fully relaxed on a Friday night, with my feet up and a glass of wine at hand. And despite the week coming up in my near future, I’m going to, as my sister Erin would say, “Choose to be happy.”

An afternoon in Providence

Tom and I spent the afternoon in Providence, or Downtown, as it always is in my head. And of course, when I hear the word downtown, I end up with a song from my childhood stuck in my head. One I learned from Nana or Great Nana. I forget who, but I have a memory of being bounced on someone’s knee to the following tune:

I went downtown to see my lady. Who should I meet but Kitty and the baby. Kitty was drunk, and I was sober. Kitty went “plbbt” and knocked me over.

So anyway, I went downtown, not to see my lady but to catch a Providence Bruins game. I won a four pack of flex tickets at a silent auction last spring, and we needed to use the last two tickets before the season ends. With a busy weekend planned next week, today was our last chance to see a game together.

With a little time to kill before the game, we stopped in to Malted Barley for a drink and a pretzel. Not wanting to drink a full beer, I went for the Dave’s Coffee Martini – I don’t know who Dave is, but his namesake drink was pretty yummy. I had a regular salted pretzel with beer cheese, and Tom went for the cheddar and bacon pretzel with spinach artichoke dip. Malted Barley is quickly becoming one of our go-to places downtown. Can’t beat a pretzel and dip, and their pretzel sandwiches are the best.

After our quick snack and drink it was just a short walk to the Dunk where we traded our flex passes for the best available seats:

I was a sophomore at RIC in 1992 when the Providence Bruins played their first season. Somewhere in a Rubbermaid container in my basement, among the other detritus of my college years, is a keychain replica of the first game’s ticket, along with an old bumper sticker that says “Something’s Bruin in Providence”. My suitemates and I were at opening night and many, many games after that. For the next few years, I knew the P-Bruins roster better than the Boston roster.

We would hit the games and then head over to Players Corner Pub in hopes of meeting the team. One of my friends had a crush on Mike Bales, the goalie, although Andy McKim was more my type. We never met either of them, but I did once get an autograph from Sergei Zholtok.

The games were different then – the crowd was rowdy and between periods Samboni, the ice-skating bear mascot, would fire t-shirts into the crowd. If you got there early enough, you could watch the pre-game warmups and maybe catch a puck. I once had a puck land right in front of my seat. But that was before the ceiling high nets went up around most of the rink.

There was a “mad trumpeteer” who roamed the crowd, bursting into loud trumpeting when play stopped. Every time I go to a game now, I wonder what ever happened to him. I distinctly remember a friend getting up and dancing with him when he neared our section.

The game today was a good one – and ended in a P-Bruins victory. But it was almost like the game was secondary to the other entertainment. Every stoppage of play included another song and opportunity to get your face on-screen. I’m fine with the occasional dance or even kiss-cam, but now everything is sponsored. The low point for me was when they asked the crowd to “Get silly for chili” – the silliest fan won coupons for their section for a free chili at Wendy’s. Really?

Our initial post-game dinner plan had been to try Ken’s Ramen on Washington St, but a visit to Yelp determined that it is permanently closed. So, option two was The Vig – a new-ish restaurant in the Hilton Hotel. I had heard good things and the Yelp reviews were positive.

It was pretty empty, being fairly early on a Sunday evening, and the service was spot on. The bacon caramel popcorn was fantastic!

We ordered poutine for an appetizer – it was not bad, although I felt it needed more cheese. The heavy appetizer filled us up quickly, so we were hesitant when our entrees arrived. I went with the French onion burger, while Tom opted for the bacon mac & cheese. Both entrees were ok, but not anything I’d rush back for. We took our leftovers to go, including the popcorn, which I’m looking forward to enjoying later during our latest Doctor Who binge.

So, Rhode Islanders, if you’re reading along, what are your go-to dining spots in Providence? We do most of our dining out in the Warwick area, so it’s always good to have some other ideas if we are going downtown. And there I go again…I’ll be singing that song all night.

Ever have one of those days?

You know, the kind of day when the best thing you can say about your day is that you made it through without stabbing anyone. I had one of those today.

Here are some of the things I use to shake off a bad day:

A frozen mocha…doesn’t matter from where. Starbucks or Panera are my go to but Dunkin’ will do in a pinch. Something about the chocolate and coffee and whipped cream makes everything better.

Bob Dylan’s album “Desire.” I’m pretty sure I napped to this a lot as a toddler, which I assume is why it has such a soothing effect on me. By the time I get to “Romance in Durango”, I’m usually singing along. It is also a good accompaniment to washing dishes.

A hot shower – the hotter the better. It’s really my cure for anything. Headache, stomachache, back pain, and especially a vague sense of malaise. Nothing better for washing away a crappy day.

Making stupid faces on Snapchat. I rarely actually take a picture and almost never share them. But why be in a bad mood when you can be a unicorn?

Celestial Seasonings Honey Vanilla Chamomile tea. As far as I’m concerned, this stuff is calm in a mug. It’s my go to when I am worrying excessively over things that will probably never happen.

If all else fails, I remind myself, as Monty Python would say, to “always look on the bright side of life.” (You’re singing along, aren’t you?)

Tell me a story

I can’t count the number of times I said that as a kid. I still like to hear a good story. The adults in my life all obliged, in very different manners.

Great Nana’s stories were about her life, and I very much wish I had paid more attention or written some of them down. Her most frequently told story, that I recall, was about the “bums” (her word, not mine), who came off the railroad and tried to steal their chickens. Her mother would feed them so they would leave the chickens alone, but they were never allowed in the house. I don’t know why that particular story stuck with me, but I know that I spent a semester turning it into a short story for a senior writing seminar in college.

Nana, on the other hand, would simply respond to my “tell me a story” request with this: “I’ll tell you a story of Jack Anory, and now my story’s begun. I’ll tell you another of Jack and his brother, and now my story is done.” It did the job, at least until I figured out that she wasn’t really telling me anything.

Dad’s bedtime stories revolved around two sisters: Suzi and Sally. They were remarkably similar to Erin and I. Except their bedroom was always clean, they always obeyed their parents, and they never, ever, fought about stupid things like whose turn it was to turn off the light. (Seriously, Erin. You were closer!)

Grampy told some wild stories about his life, not all of which I am sure are true. But he did perfect the world’s shortest bedtime story. On the nights when I slept over his response to a story request was simply: “Once upon a time. The End.”

Synchronicity

It’s not just an album by The Police.

I’m a big fan of Julia Cameron and “The Artist’s Way.” I’ve been through the book twice, and am leaning heavily toward another reading of it. I do morning pages faithfully every day. She talks a lot about synchronicity.

Have you ever thought about an old friend and run into them the next day? That’s synchronicity. Thought to yourself, “I need a new desk,” and gotten a phone call from someone who is getting rid of one? Synchronicity. Chosen a book by a Rhode Island author for your next book club topic, only to learn that your local library is having a Writers of the Ocean State event in a few weeks? Synchronicity.

God, or the universe, or your higher consciousness wants to give you what you want. But they aren’t just going to give it to you – you have to meet them halfway. You have to say yes to the person offering you the desk. You have to go to the writers event.

It’s like the story of the man who prays every week to win the lottery. Finally, on his knees, he asks, “Why, God? Why won’t you let me win the lottery?” And God says, “My son, you have to buy a ticket.”

Since starting this project, I’ve had so many Great Nana quotes come to mind that I’ve started keeping a list. Things I had not thought of in years. When I tried to come up with an “as Great Nana would say” for this post, the first thing that came to mind was, “God bless ya, God bless ya, you threw your leg over the dresser, God bless ya.” It was her response to a sneeze. Not sure that it has anything at all to do with synchronicity, or why anyone would throw their leg over a dresser, but there it is.

Tonight, we roll…

It’s my month to host the family bunco night. The theme (Little Rhody) has been announced and evites have been sent. I’ve got dinner planned, dessert picked up, winner and loser prizes purchased, and snacks prepared. My house is clean-ish. The only thing left is to await the arrival of the bunco queens.

RI shaped donut cake from Allie’s Donuts

We’ve been playing since 1996 – a monthly chance for the ladies in the family to get together, roll the dice, and catch up on each other’s lives. We are three generations – my mother and aunties, my sister and cousins, and now my nieces. We have seen each other through weddings, divorces, births, and several high school and college graduations.

Not to mention a lot of milestone birthdays, often celebrated with a mystery day or a surprise at the bunco night closest to said birthday. Last year, when my niece Allison turned 16, we gave her “Sixteen Sweets” – a giant basket full of cookies, candy and other assorted treats. She loved it!

There were times over the past twenty years, when I didn’t love our bunco nights. When it felt like an obligation to give up a Friday night. But as time has gone on, I have come to appreciate the time with my crazy family. We all have our quirks, but it’s what makes us who we are. And we support each other – no matter what.

Bunco nights are loud and silly and generally include a mid-game dance break, as well as an impromptu Broadway sing-a-long. (Brooklyn’s here!) They are exactly what I need at the end of a long week. I can count on my bunco queens to shake me out of whatever funk I’m in and get me laughing. And usually singing.

We joke that the only way to quit bunco is if you’re dead. But honestly, I wouldn’t quit if given the chance. We took a vote once about whether to give up bunco, but it didn’t pass. After all, as my cousin Jamie would say, “You don’t HAVE to come to bunco. You GET to come to bunco.”

Lena’s Smiling PHACE

You’ve probably never heard of PHACE Syndrome. I hadn’t either until twelve years ago. I’ll never forget the day my sister called to tell me about my infant niece Lena’s PHACE diagnosis. I was standing in the produce section at Stop & Shop, picking up burgers to make for dinner. I remember her telling me about what amounted to a knot of blood vessels in her head, and another in her throat, blocking most of her airway. I stood there and I listened and I just kept asking, “but they can fix it, right?”

Twelve years and multiple medical procedures later, Miss Lena is a happy, well adjusted kid. She takes piano and dance lessons, and loves everything art related. Like me, she loves to write and is a fan of Trixie Belden books. She’s my weekly reminder to keep working on my own book. And she’s a sweet, generous, giving girl. She takes every doctor visit and procedure in stride, with a positive attitude.

I asked Lena to help me out with this post and share a little bit of what her life with PHACE is like and here’s what she had to say:

I have been living with PHACE for basically my whole life so it doesn’t really effect me as much. What I mean by this is that I was diagnosed with PHACE when I was not even one year old so if PHACE effects me, I don’t really realize it. I’m used to doctors appointments and stuff …. It is just normal for me. What PHACE is is basically an acronym for symptoms. you have to have I think at least 3 of the symptoms. Recently I went to a conference where people with PHACE came from all over the place. It was so nice to have people who can relate to me. Like this surgery that I hate, because you have to lay straight for so many hours. So yes there is not a permanent cure for it but I am ok with that because it makes me me. I do though would like to help other people get more knowledge about PHACE.

The PHACE Syndrome Community Friends is an organization that works to promote awareness, share medical information, support research and provide a community for PHACE families. Their annual conference gives Lena a chance to meet other kids with PHACE, and my sister and brother-in-law an opportunity to connect with other PHACE parents.

My large extended family have thrown ourselves into supporting PHACE awareness, and if you follow any of us on Facebook or Instagram, you’ve no doubt seen us use the #showyourphace hashtag this week. Lena and I like to take Snapchat photos each year…here is this year’s:

So what can you do to promote PHACE Syndrome Awareness week? Wear red today for PHACE awareness and #showyourphace with a picture. If you’re inspired by Lena’s story, visit www.phacesyndromecommunity.org to learn more about PHACE or to make a donation.

Happy St Patrick’s Day…

…and Happy Birthday to Uncle Art, another of the voices in my head. He is not as frequent a visitor as some of the others, but I do hear him occasionally. Uncle Art gave me my first typewriter, back in the day when we still used them. I don’t know how he knew that I would end up writing, but I guess he did. He was the type of adult who actually listened to the answers when he asked a kid a question.

Growing up, I thought Uncle Art just didn’t like the color orange, because he would say “Hate orange.” It was years before I understood that the “Orange” had more political and religious connotations for the Irish. And yet, I still say it now and then, without even realizing it. My five-year-old niece Aria recently informed my mother that Auntie Tara doesn’t like orange. I’ve no memory of using that phrase to her but I guess those voices slip out even when I don’t know it.

Having been a religious brother, Uncle Art was, at least to me, the expert on religion in our family. Once on a trip to visit him in Boston, I refused a giant chocolate chip cookie, because I had given up cookies for Lent. “It doesn’t count when you’re traveling,” was his response. I took his word for it, even though I wasn’t sure a day trip to Boston counted as traveling. He would know, I guess…and the cookie was delicious.

The other, oft repeated, Uncle Art-ism that sticks out for me is that if a company has their name on something, “they expect you to take it.” This is why, somewhere packed away in a box, I have a place setting of Sheraton Tara silverware that he brought home for me from some trip or other. It’s become something of a running joke for some of us, pointing out things we could take because they expect that.

I think of Uncle Art most at St Patrick’s Day, because it is his birthday, and at Christmas, because he loved it so much. He would arrive at my Nana’s house on Christmas with presents for all, and still have us all to lunch at his house on the 26th, where we would find another pile of gifts under his tree. He was truly one of the most generous people I’ve ever known.

And not to forget the holiday itself, as Great Nana would say, it is always Saint Patrick’s Day and never Saint Patty’s. If you must shorten it, it’s Paddy’s. I will celebrate with a pint of Guinness and boiled dinner, with my brother’s “Gramps” playlist gracing us with Irish music. And despite the fact that green is not my color, I’m wearing a green t-shirt. After all, as Great Nana would say, “Green, green, you’re the queen.”

Bears, Bones, Battlestar Galactica? What I’m reading this week…

Just kidding…there’s absolutely no Battlestar Galactica in any of the books I’m reading, at least as far as I know. But here’s what I’m reading at the moment.

“Bag of Bones” is a reread – one of my favorite Stephen King’s. I’m a huge King fan, from my very first encounter with him (The Dead Zone) in junior high, and his books are high on my reread list. This particular story of Mike Noonan and his summer at Sara Laughs, his vacation home on Dark Score Lake, is one of my favorites. I read it every couple years, usually alternated with “The Stand” and “It.” And of course anything new that comes along. There aren’t a lot of Stephen King’s that I haven’t read. So far the only one I didn’t like was “Gerald’s Game.” Not a bad track record.

“Beartown” is a new read – borrowed from my brother Joel, along with the second in the series, “Us Against You.” I have read another Frederik Backman – our book club read “My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She’s Sorry,” which I liked but not everyone did. It’s because I’m “literary”, right, Erin? Anyway, Beartown is about hockey in a small town in Sweden, and starts off with a shotgun being fired into someone’s forehead. I don’t think that counts as a spoiler, since it happens on page 1. I’m only a chapter or two into it, as I got distracted by an actual hockey game last night, though reading would have been preferable to watching the Bruins lose. One side note, being a Boston fan, I keep reading Beartown as Beantown. Go B’s!

Finally, “Sisters” by Kellie Coates Gilbert, is a Kindle freebie. It’s book one in a series about sisters living in Sun Valley, Idaho. I’m a sucker for a small town series – my favorite being Robyn Carr’s “Virgin River” – and a lot of the free books on Kindle are book one of a series. I don’t always continue on to the next book, but many times I do. Anyway, this particular book is devoted to middle sister Karyn, who is finding her way after the death of her husband. I generally read the Kindle books in bed, because if I fall asleep it automatically saves my place. Thus, I’m not very far into this one either, because I do keep falling asleep. Not because it isn’t good, but because the only way to shut my brain up long enough to fall asleep is to read until I can’t possibly keep my eyes open. But I’ll share at a later date if this one turns out to be good.

So that’s where I am this week – in the middle of three books. My goal is to read 155 books in 2019. According to Goodreads, I’ve read 28 so far, and am one book behind in order to hit my goal. For the record, I don’t usually count rereads, although I will if I get desperate. Like if it’s December 28 and I’m five books short, I might throw “Bag of Bones” on there. But I’m trying not to.

I don’t have an “As Great Nana would say” for this post, so instead I’ll leave you with this…as Stephen King would say, “Books are a uniquely portable magic.” Happy reading!